Dealing with Shame and Guilt As a Result of Addiction pt. III
Because of the differences between shame and guilt (who I am versus what I did), people respond to each emotion differently.
Guilt, because it emphasizes what someone did wrong, tends to elicit more constructive responses, particularly responses that seek to mend the damage done. Guilt is tied to beliefs about what is wrong, moral and immoral. When we violate one of these moral guidelines, it causes us to feel guilty over our actions and seek to fix what we have done. As a result, guilt is an important tool in maintaining standards of right and wrong in individuals and society as a whole. As such, guilt can often be used as a tool to overcome conflict.
The Implications of SEC Online Porn Allegations
After the release of an L.A. Times article on the allegations against the SEC, I thought I’d take some time to share my thoughts on the implications and real cost of sex addiction. After all, this is the face of sexual addiction in America today. This is how this disease affects all of us. When SEC government employees are spending hundreds of hours looking at thousands of porn images instead of doing their jobs, the negative impact is nearly unfathomable.
Healing the Addict in Sexual Recovery
The saying, “There is nothing worse than a reformed smoker” applies even more intensely when dealing with sexual addicts. While it is true that early recovery requires a clear and well-defined sexual plan and often may require a period of celibacy, I never cease to be amazed by the degree of judgment, sexual anorexia and fear that can be generated by sex addicts who actually chose to engage in some form of sex in their early part of recovery.
Tiger Woods Words Offer Hope to Sex Addicts and Their Spouses
It was a gift to hear Tiger Woods in his news conference today prior to the US Masters. Anyone who wants to understand the most hopeful outcome of sex addiction rehab should listen to his words to the media today. Though people do go into treatment to avoid problems and negative consequences, they can leave as a better person than they were when they went in. Listening today, I heard a man who actually got what he needed to get out of rehab. I heard sincerity, accountability and a focus on the right priorities – home, family and healing. He cut the line well at keeping his private life private -while also owning the harm, hurt and loss he has caused and incurred.
Sexual addiction expert weighs in on Jesse James: rehab anything but a “cop out”
LOS ANGELES, Calif., April 02, 2010 — Following rumours that Jesse James has checked into rehab for sex addiction, Robert Weiss, LCSW, CSAT-S, founding director of the Sexual Recovery Institute, today issued the following statement to explain how simple pleasure oriented behaviours can evolve into addiction and the importance of seeking treatment.
