Understanding Bisexuality

Research, literature, and societal attitudes about bisexuality are all over the board. Part of the issue is that many people don’t understand what it is. Essentially, to be a bisexual man or woman means having a personally significant and meaningful romantic and/or sexual attraction to both males and females. One does not have to act upon bisexual feelings to self-identify as such, nor does one have to be equally attracted to both sexes. Furthermore, bisexual activity does not mean that one is truly bisexual (more on this below). Simply put, bisexuality, like all forms of sexuality, exists on a continuum. 

Interventions with Active Sex Addicts

In a previous blog we discussed the signs of sexual addiction, which can help you to spot active sexual addiction in friends and family members. But what do you do when you spot several of the primary indicators and think a loved one may need intervention? Usually, the best thing you can do is talk with that person openly and honestly, without being judgmental. Before doing this, though, you may want to consider the following steps:

Recognizing Sexual Addiction in Friends and Family

Sex addicts are not as easy to spot as one might think. This is because they work very hard to hide their problem. Often, the people around sex addicts are fairly helpful in this regard. This is especially common in family settings, where spouses need to believe that their significant other is trustworthy and dependable, children need to believe that their mom and dad are consistently doing the right thing, and parents need to believe that they’ve done a good job raising their kids. 

Understanding Sexual Addiction Triggers

“Triggers” are the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that set the addictive cycle in motion. If a sex addict can learn to identify his or her triggers and stop them in their tracks, that person has a chance to stay sexually sober. Unfortunately, anything that causes a sex addict to recall the (long-lost) pleasure of compulsive sexual behaviors can trigger the addiction cycle. This means that almost anything—not just external things (people, places, and events) but internal things (thoughts, feelings, and fantasies)—can prompt a desire to re-engage the addiction. 

Are Movies About Sexual Addiction Worthwhile?

Since 2011 there have been four widely released films about sexual addiction:

• Shame (2011): starring Michael Fassbender
• Thanks for Sharing (2013): starring Mark Ruffalo, Tim Robbins, Pink, and Josh Gad
• Don Jon (2013): starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Scarlett Johansson, and Julianne Moore
• Nymphomaniac: Volume I (2014): starring Charlotte Gainsbourg and Stellan Skarsgård

Digital Devices, Sexual Addiction, and the Workplace

A surprisingly large percentage of sex addicts, porn addicts, and love addicts enter treatment after they are caught misusing work-issued computers, smartphones, and other digital devices. Usually, during work hours or against specific company regulations, they’ve been looking at porn, flirting and planning hookups via “adult friend finder” apps, sexting, having webcam sex, or whatever. Frankly, the list of ways in which company-issued digital devices are misused by sex, porn, and love addicts is endless (and constantly expanding as new “abusable” technologies hit the market almost daily).